Isingeniso:
Ukuze uqonde i-Cult of the Unicorn, intatheli icela umfundi ukuba ahlanganyele naye esidlekeni sokhozi. I-aerie yami ingamamitha amahlanu ububanzi futhi inesisindo esicishe sibe yithani. Ngenxa yokuthi kudingekile ukuze unyukele phezulu ukuze ubhale ngokucacile, lesi sidleke siphakeme phezu kwentaba futhi sivikelekile phakathi kwamadwala edwala. Uphephile phakathi kwesidleke sami. Ngingumbungazi wakho. Kodwa manje ngicela ungithembe. Ngijoyine kule ndiza. Ake sikhuphukele emhlabeni wokucabanga. Sekuyisikhathi sokuzindla ngenkolo ye-unicorn.
Izintaba:
Kwenzeka ngomzuzwana nje. Indoda yaphuma embhedeni wayo ngolunye usuku ekuseni futhi yathola umzuzu wayo wokugcina wokukhanya. Eshesha eyongena ekhabetheni lakhe lokungena, wema phambi kwendlu engcwele yohlobo oluthile, isibuko esigcwele ubude ayesihlanza ngamandla izikhathi eziningana ngosuku. Kwakuyiqiniso! Isidalwa sasikhona, singasacashile emehlweni akhe, kodwa sibonakala sigcwele. Wayeyi-unicorn! Wayesizwa ngesigqi somzimba wakhe kanye nokushaya kwenhliziyo yakhe. Kwakungekho ukuphika lokho umthakathi (okwaziwa ngokuthi i-psyche yakhe) ayemtshela khona. Wayeyi-unicorn!
Ngonyaka olandelayo, le ndoda yenza konke eyayingakwenza ukuze ithole amanye ama-unicorn. Wathola abambalwa ababedlalisa amanqina embuzi. Ngokuxhumana nezinye izidalwa ezingaqondakali, wakwazi ukuthola amasethi amabili adingekayo ngentengo ebizayo. Efake izinselo zakhe, wayesebenza ngasese emzini wakhe ukuze ahambe ngezinyawo ezine. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi wafunda ukugxumagxuma, ukulondoloza ukuhambahamba, ngisho nokugabavula ngezinselo zakhe.
Esebenzisa inethiwekhi kancane wakwazi ukuthola umsila webhubesi elihle. Impande yomsila yayinombala osagolide futhi yashintsha yaba owolintshi oshisayo othandekayo waze wafinyelela uzipho lomsila owawuyithusi elicebile.
Empeleni indoda yachitha iminyaka eyishumi eyalandela isebenzela ukuthola ucezu lwe-narwhal, umdwebi owaluguqula lwaba uphondo oluhle lwengalo nengxenye ubude. Lapho ithola udokotela owayezimisele ukushumeka le nto esiphongweni sayo, le ndoda yakhipha imali ukuze iqedele lolu shintsho. Lapho ebuyela ekhaya, wema phambi kwethempeli lakhe futhi wazincoma. Ah, yebo! Kwakukuhle ukuba i-unicorn!
Amathafa:
Ngokuhamba kweminyaka, ama-unicorns ayanda futhi avela emphakathini ohloniphekile. Ngithi mphakathi ohloniphekile, ngoba akumele sikubeke okusobala. Sibheke indoda enophondo olude oluphuma esiphongweni. Ngokuyimfihlo siyacabanga, “Usizi luni lolu oluphuma emphefumulweni womuntu na?” Ngokunyenyeza, sibuza abangani bethu abaseduze kakhulu, “Akufanele yini sikhathazwe yilokho okudinga ukuphulukiswa?” Kodwa umongameli wethu ohloniphekile uye wasekela ama-unicorns ngesikhathi sakhe sobumongameli. Uzenze umniki-mthetho: Kufanele sithole izindlu zokugezela, amagumbi okugqokisa, kanye nezindlu zokukhiya zesikole zama-unicorn. Ama-unicorns kumele avunyelwe abe yilokho acabanga ukuthi ayikho endaweni engcwele kuye uqobo.
Isigodi:
Ngakho ngolunye usuku indoda nowesifazane manje sebevezwe ngokugcwele enkolweni ye-unicorn bazala indodana. Ebuka uhlaka lwakhe oluncane olunqunu, amthinte kancane isiphongo bobabili bamamatheke lapho bebukana. “Sibelethe i-unicorn!”
Ukujula:
Labo abakhonza ngaphakathi kwehlelo le-unicorn bebenathi kusukela ekuqaleni kwesikhathi. Bebesemaphethelweni omphakathi kuwo wonke umlando. Kepha manje, ngobuhlakani nokungazweli komongameli wethu waseMelika, izindlela zokuphila ziyaphakanyiswa futhi zifakwe ezingeni lokuthi zona kanye izingane zethu zisengozini. Kuyinto eyodwa ngomuntu ukuba akhulekele endaweni engcwele azikhethele yona. Kepha akunangqondo ukuthi abantu baseMelika baphoqwa ukuthi bakhonze endaweni engcwele abaningi bethu abayibheka njengeyingozi ezinhlelweni ezinhle zomphakathi onempilo. Kuyacindezela, ukuthi igatsha eliphezulu lifuna ukushushisa ngokusemthethweni labo abenqaba ukukhulekela endaweni engcwele ye-unicorn.
Futhi kuthiwani ngabantwana? Kuthiwani ngabantwana abancane abaqinisekiswa ihlelo elingcolile ukuthi kulungile ukufuna ukuguqula ngokuyisisekelo sona kanye imvelo esiphiwe uMdali? Kunini lapho sifaka khona ukuthi isithombe seqiniso esavezwa uMongameli Obama akulona iqiniso ngempela, kodwa inkohliso ekhuliswe ngokucophelela?
Kunini sikubiza ngokuhlukunyezwa kwezingane? Akukhona yini ukuhlukunyezwa kwezingane ukufuna ukucwiywa kwezitho zangasese zengane, ukwethulwa kokwelashwa ngama-hormone, izinqubo eziningi zokuhlinza ezidingekayo ukuze kuguqulwe ubulili?
Akufanele yini kube nesihawu? Futhi ingabe isihawu esinjalo akufanele sifune ukuphulukiswa okungokomzwelo nangokwengqondo kulabo abakholelwa ukuthi bangama-unicorn?
Ngiyabonga ngokuthatha indiza nami namuhla. Sike sabuka amagquma, amathafa, izigodi nokujula. Sibuyele esidlekeni ngokuphepha. Njengoba ubuyela esidlekeni sakho sasekhaya, zibuke esibukweni sakho. Bonga ngomklamo kaNkulunkulu ngempilo yakho.
